Predictions of doom....while I'm feeling happy

The relationship that I have with Patti has inspired a number of opinions. There are those who know me well and are very happy for me. They know that I try to be thoughtful and not careless. They have the belief that things will work out all right between Patti and I.

There are those who point out how much I am flouting conventional wisdom. I am with someone I did not know 6 weeks ago. That person has now stayed at my place overnight several times. Currently, she is scheduled to come every weekend except Easter. Other plans are being made with her. I'm moving fast, no doubt. There's the belief by some that I am really foolish. If I flout and ignore conventional wisdom, conventional wisdom will "kick back", and the lack of knowledge I have about this person will hurt me.

I wanted to point out a few things. First of all, I am not allowing my new relationship, one that has already given me so much happiness, to take away from time I see my kids. I see my 3 children as much as before the relationship. That is a fact. Few things are more important to me than being a good father.
Secondly, I don't have plans to marry this person right away; in fact, I don't want a wedding for a long time. That necessarily means a number of things before I marry her. If I find out she's a pathological liar, if she can't stand the fact that I can be a slob sometimes, if we are unable to come together and live within our means, if she thinks I'm boring because I talk about politics too often, if she just can't deal with my combative ex-wife, if there are any other "deal breakers" going on, then we leave each other. We end the relationship. That's not so terribly difficult to do when you're not married.
Right now, we are very attentive to each other and that means we enjoy the strengths we bring to a relationship and also are looking at weaknesses that we may be showing each other. We have been open, candid. We are not mincing words.
I feel that I've learned how to avoid a lot of mistakes when I'm in a relationship. I think what I have learned in my last relationship is helping me a great deal in this one.

People have a right to have an opinion about me going rather "fast" in my current relationship with Patti. However, Patti has made me very happy. No person has EVER been so devoted, so kind and so giving to me as Patti. Since she has many positive attributes (a good listener, a genuinely kind, sharing person, a resourceful person, someone who is neat, THE LIST DEFINITELY GOES ON AND ON), I am most definitely going to reciprocate my love for her. She is definitely worth that. She is well liked by my kids. I know she can be a good, if not great, influence on them. Yes, I do see her as she relates to my kids. Believe it or not, Jean T. my relationship with my kids is more important than my relationship with Patti. Therefore, if she benefits, augments how I help raise them, how could I not value her?

I am going through a new, wonderful, loving relationship with my eyes open. I think it would be incredibly stupid to keep her at "arms length" to mollify my critics in the Comments section of my last post. I will look at warning signs that could endanger or degenerate the relationship, but until then I will continue loving Patti and hope that we have a wonderful future together.

I also think that it's rather illogical to assume that just because I don't post here as much as I used to that means I'm neglecting my kids (see Comments from the last post, last one). I am seeing them as much as I can. I love them and will continue to be the good parent I know in my heart that I am. The fact that I'm not spending as much time here may in fact mean that I am spending time with them or with someone else, but not necesarily her, because maybe I'm working (60 hrs. a week, remember?!?) or maybe I'm with my kids.

A DRAMATIC CHANGE!

There's a woman at my dating service, Chrisian Mingle, who is very, very attracted to me. She said, "I melt for you everytime I see your picture," and "you're the nicest guy I've ever met." Can you believe it? No, I can't either (the 1st quote is definitely less believable than the 2nd one. I mean really, look at the picture I put out in the summer and also this past winter!). I like her and I could see having a relationship with her. She calls and tells me she's not going to be able to wait all the way to Sunday. I can't help but think about all the cleaning I'm going to have to do to my apartment. I can wait until Sunday because as busy as I'll be during the week, I'll barely have enough time to take my apartment out of the "disgusting to be in" category. She speaks hopefully about us being friends for a lifetime. I think that if we are, that's fine.

I'm really drawn to her enthusiasm. If you're a person who had a hard time dating and/or spent many nights alone in your bed, when somebody tells you how great looking you are, what a special person you are, & how sweet and thoughtful you are, well, that's a person you want to be around. When you are starved for some "lovin' " and she excitedly talks about spending most of Monday snuggling with me in my apartment, well....you look forward to Monday too!
Falling in love is definitely the happiest time of a person's life. We were made to love.
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Now, there's a certain benevolent soul out there that has given me good advice when things have gone wrong for me. She has done so on a pretty consistent basis. I am very interested to read what she has to say about this new, more positive development.