back to losing weight through ANGER

My oldest son's birthday party last night. He's 14; I'm relieved that he's got some good friends. I spent $116 having his party at HOLLYWOOD PARK. ($100-HP + $16 for cake, WATCHING YOUR KIDS BE HAPPY, PRICELESS!!!!)

HOLLYWOOD P. is an arcade place. I found out that Maribeth bumped up the expense from $95 for the party to $150 w/o letting me know. I put $25 down to reserve party. So I walk into the office to pay the rest and just got floored w/ MB's wonderful idea. Then I got pissed and asked her for more money. I used some tact, I think. She gave me $50. Then, before I paid, I lost my fuckin' VISA CARD, and had to run to CHASE which (b/c they are so big & ubiquitous) was only a few blocks away. Then I paid for it. MB's idea of increasing it to $150 was a good one. The more you spend on the party the more game tokens you get. & WE WENT THROUGH GAME TOKENS LIKE SHIT THROUGH A TIN HORN!

So anyway, I fell in love w/ this terrorist game at the arcade place. I actually used to use guns on the farm and kill sparrows and starlings. *Starlings are a greasy, angry, pig of a bird w/ few redeeming features, and as soon as the cats saw me carrying a gun around about 4 of them were smart enough to follow me around, b/c it meant lunch and suppertime ALL ROLLED INTO ONE. love by cats, gotta love it. & besides, it's proven by those who study them, that starlings single-handedly reduced the bluebird population in the United States. They peck out their eggs, so they won't be born. Wow, reader! Where's the outrage, killing the unborn.

So anyway, I'm playing this terrorist game, and blasting the shit out of the terrorists. I single handedly advanced 4 levels and earned 5 medals. I thought what great therapy! This feels great! I'm gonna be so much calmer when I get home. I was looking forward to my newfound happiness (especially since I only spent $4 on the game) when I got home.

& MB pissed me off when we got home by acting like her usual dour self. Do you realize that back in 1992, she used to come to my place after I worked as a temp paralegal and then: 1. ate my supper I served her 2. laid on my couch and fell asleep! THE END, wake up the next morning.

I bring that '92 story up b/c she obviously had no cancer then and made everyone in the house tense last night b/c she went to bed at 8:45....just like in 1992. So why did I marry her in 1993 if we fought in 1992, and she pulled the above routine on me occasionally?? I don't know, reader, you have a point, YOU WIN!!

So I'm sitting here angry, and bought Beechnut like I did back in 1980. Can you believe that? I must really be carrying a lot of anger and resentment about my fate. I must really be driven to a shitty point in life w/ her cancer and everything.

So, my conclusion is that if you go to Afganhistan and slaughter 100 members of Al Queda, you won't feel happy and smug about ridding terrorists from the face of the earth. It might just make you feel bad. AM I a pretty good amateur sociologist????

oops, time for a disclaimer. I fully support the fighting done by NATO in Afganhistan. So, if you think I'm a pacifist Democrat, you're wrong. God bless the troops.